


Fairytales

by Nwar



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Fluffy, M/M, Princess and the Frog, Snake Crowley, Sweet, The Frog Prince, aziraphale doesn't know he's the snake, but it all works out well, fairytale, he wanted to kiss him anyway, may be considered nonconsensual in that a character is tricked into a kiss, minor deception, the snake prince??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 15:16:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20260192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nwar/pseuds/Nwar
Summary: A new fairytale has just been published on the subject of kissing a slimy creature and turning him into a prince...





	Fairytales

**Author's Note:**

> Quick non-canon note: nothing changes other than that Crowley arrives on the wall to watch Adam and Eve before Aziraphale, meaning Aziraphale doesn't know he came up in snake form. Aziraphale just considers him a regular demon, and is unaware that he can take the form of a snake. Happy reading!

Aziraphale liked to pretend that he read only the most highbrow, intellectual, humanity saving literature that was published. Crowley often teased him for being pretentious, that the books now made on this new automatic printing press just aren’t as good as those monk-written volumes. Only real ninth century kids remember, and all that.   
Of course, he was just that-- pretending. Aziraphale enjoyed reading immensely, and subsequently read rather a lot. One tends to grow weary of treatises and essays on philosophy after a while, and nobody could blame him for indulging in a few lighthearted romances (and wasn’t Miss Burney quite on to something with that little tale?). He’d never admit it, but at the end of the day, he was quite happy to close up shop, draw shut the curtains, and curl in with some positively frivolous literature.  
Which is exactly what he was doing today, reclining in his armchair by the desk, one ankle laid delicately on the opposite knee. Two brothers, by the last name of Grimm, had published a compendium of children’s stories and folktales.   
He was halfway through the omnibus of oral tradition when he reached “The Frog Prince”. It told the slightly gruesome story of a very, very handsome prince being cursed and turned into a frog. Only a maiden brave enough to kiss him would be able to free him from the curse and become his wife forevermore. Though he’d discorporate before acknowledging it, Aziraphale had a certain demon’s face in mind for the prince, and was loathe to consider him in the form of a greasy amphibian. If the opportunity ever came to him, he’d kiss the thing straight away and get Crowley tight in his arms.   
There were multiple levels on which this was sinful; primary being of course that Crowley was a demon and therefore very much forbidden, as well as that Crowley did tend to lean towards more masculine presentation, and that was a sin under the king of England. Kissing a frog may even fall under bestiality. However, in this darkened shop, by the burning light of his lantern, and in his nightgown, Aziraphale felt safe indulging his fantastical imaginings.   
In the story, the frog climbed to the maiden’s bedside table and cajoled her. The maiden, understandably, resisted.   
He heard a dull thud from the other room.   
“Who is there?” Azira called out. “We are indeed closed,” he continued nervously.   
He startled in his seat when a large, richly scaled black snake slithered into the room.   
“Oh, um, why, uh,” he said nervously as the snake hovered its head above the floor, climbing the desk to his right. “We truly are closed.”   
The snake ignored these protests at it smoothly wrapped itself over the fabric of the chair back before coming to rest its head on Aziraphale’s shoulder.   
Aziraphale tucked his chin into his chest in alarm to look down at the snake. “Well, really, I-- What, are you intending to read?”   
The snake looked directly in Aziraphale. It occurred to the angel then that the snake’s head was so large that if it chose to bite him on the face he may well discorporate. He hadn’t seen any snake of this size before-- he’d seen a picture once, from an expedition through the amazon, but it didn’t resemble any of the little grass snakes he’d seen in fields. The snake didn’t seem to have any interest in biting him, though. It just blinked slowly and turned back to the page as if yes, it did intend to read.   
The snake tilted its head slightly, and Aziraphale got the cue to continue reading. “And the prince said to the princess, ‘I beg of you, it is only one small touching of lips that prevents me from being royalty’,” he said slowly. “And the maiden replied, ‘I cannot deny you my kiss’, and as she placed her lips on his slick skin, he magically transformed to the handsome young prince and the curse was broken. For her sacrifice, the prince married her and they fell in true love. The witch was banished from the kingdom, and they lived happily ever after’.”   
The snake slithered around the chair to wrap his body up in Aziraphale’s lap as he closed the book and set it on the desk.   
“I rather like you,” Aziraphale said lightly. “All of God’s creatures are beautiful, but you are quite sweet as well.”   
The snake moved its head so it was looking at him head-on. “I might just keep you. We’ll have to find some kind of cage for when customers are in--”   
The snake distinctly moved its head side-to-side. “Oh! You understand me? No cage then, I suppose.”   
The snake moved its tail slowly to rap on the cover of the fairytale book. Then, just as slowly, making sure Aziraphale’s eyes were following, the snake used its tail to point to its head.   
“You want me to continue reading?” Aziraphale asked, confused. The snake let its forked tongue flutter out in what seemed like irritation. It moved the tail to point more directly at its lips. “Oh! I-- you need a kiss? Like in the book?”  
The snake opened its mouth in a pantomime of a smile and nodded.   
Aziraphale, despite himself, was in a lightheaded giddiness and failed to see the harm in the idea. The snake curled in his lap was an apparently self-aware and sentient being, who apparently was cursed and in need of a kiss to break it. The lines between reality (a strange serpent invading his book shop) and fantasy (a princely Crowley in a book of fairytales) were blurred in his nervous mind.   
The snake came closer. Aziraphale looked in the slitted eyes anxiously. What if he was wrong? What if the snake had made random movements that he had interpreted as indicative? What if he was going insane?   
Aziraphale closed his eyes and planted his lips on the snout. His lap which previously held the ungainly twist of the serpent was now filled with a man who had his arms around Aziraphale’s neck. The cool scales under his lips were taken by a warm and soft mouth, and he could smell the soft scent of Crowley’s cologne.   
Aziraphale jerked back suddenly and startled at Crowley’s face before him, the eyes just the same as the snake’s. How could he not have realized? How was he so stupid, of course the snake was Crowley! The eyes!   
Crowley smirked. “Well hello to you too, angel.”  
“Crowley!” Aziraphale meant to throw his hands up in shock, but they were still wrapped around the back and legs of the demon sat on his lap. “What-- How did you-- You utter--!”   
Crowley had the decency to look a little ashamed. “You know, I simply- I just never told you I could be a snake and when I saw you reading I-- I just wanted to be close to you.”   
Aziraphale’s hand fluttered on Crowley’s hip. “You could have told me, my dear boy.”   
Crowley smiled sheepishly. He wasn’t more than a foot away from Aziraphale, but was still surprised when he surged up to kiss him again.   
“And you don’t have to trick me to get a kiss.”

**Author's Note:**

> Fanny Burney's Evelina is considered to be one of the first romance novels. Published in 1778, it was the inspiration for Jane Austen to write her Pride and Prejudice. Burney and Austen were in a women's writing group together who passed around their works through the postal system since publishing as a woman was very difficult. It is the blueprint for the plots of many romances, including Bridget Jones's Diary. It was one of the pieces of literature the set the ball rolling for modern romance, ranking in importance close to Lady Chatterly's Lover. The Brothers Grimm are some bros who wrote down some stories they overheard.


End file.
